What is CNC (Consensual Non-Consent)? And Why There Is No Shame In Exploring It

CNC, or Consensual Non-Consent, is a form of BDSM play where one partner consents to being dominated and controlled by the other partner. It is important to note that the key word here is "consent." Both partners must agree to the terms of the CNC scenario and have a clear understanding of the boundaries and limits involved.

Before participating in CNC play, couples should have open and honest communication about their desires, boundaries, and expectations. It is important to establish a safe word that can be used to stop the scene if things become too intense or uncomfortable. In addition, both partners should be aware of any physical or emotional triggers that may arise during the play and discuss how to handle them.

It is also important for couples to have a clear understanding of the power dynamic involved in CNC play. The dominant partner is responsible for creating a safe and consensual environment, while the submissive partner is placing their trust in the dominant to provide that safety. The dominant partner should never use their power to manipulate or coerce the submissive partner into doing something they are not comfortable with.

CNC play can involve a wide range of activities, from light bondage and sensory deprivation to more intense forms of domination and submission. It is important for couples to start with activities that they are both comfortable with and slowly build up to more intense play as they become more experienced and confident.

In conclusion, CNC play can be a rewarding and fulfilling part of a BDSM relationship, but it is important for couples to have open communication, clear boundaries, and an understanding of the power dynamics involved. With these things in place, couples can explore their desires and push their boundaries in a safe and consensual way.

How Can I Regain Intimacy After Having My Baby?

Sooo… This could get a little uncomfortable! Who wants to talk about postpartum sex!?

Intimacy is an important part of any relationship, but it can be difficult to navigate postpartum. After giving birth, the body goes through a lot of changes, both physically and emotionally. It can be challenging to feel comfortable and confident in your body, which can make intimacy a bit intimidating. However, it's important to remember that intimacy is still possible and can be a vital part of postpartum recovery.

One of the biggest physical changes that occur postpartum is vaginal healing. Whether you had a vaginal birth or a C-section, it's important to give your body time to heal before engaging in any sexual activity. Your doctor will likely recommend waiting until your six-week postpartum checkup to resume sexual activity. This time frame allows your body to heal and reduces the risk of infection.

Another important aspect of postpartum intimacy is communication with your partner. It's essential to be open and honest about how you're feeling, physically and emotionally. You may be experiencing fatigue, discomfort, or even postpartum depression. Communicating with your partner can help them understand what you're going through and how they can support you.

It's also important to remember that intimacy doesn't have to be limited to sexual activity. There are many ways to be intimate such as:

• Emotional Intimacy
  
  Emotional intimacy is the bond that we form with another person through sharing our thoughts, feelings, and desires. It is the ability to be vulnerable and open with another person without fear of judgment or rejection. Emotional intimacy can be expressed through deep conversations, sharing personal stories, and offering support and encouragement.
  

• Physical Intimacy
  
  Physical intimacy involves the physical connection between two people. It can range from a simple touch to sexual activity. Physical intimacy can be expressed through holding hands, hugging, kissing, and sexual intercourse. It is a way for two people to connect on a physical level and express their love and affection for each other.
  

• Intellectual Intimacy
  
  Intellectual intimacy is the connection that we feel with another person through sharing our ideas and thoughts. It is the ability to have deep conversations about a variety of topics and to challenge each other's perspectives.

If you want to learn more about ways to maintain intimacy in your relationship, whether it is postpartum intimacy or intimacy in general contact me to book your coaching session!

How Can I Have a Healthy Relationship With Myself?!

If someone asked you about the important relationships in your life, you’d probably start listing your family and friends. However, there's one name that you may forget to mention… YOURSELF!  We often overlook ourselves when we are thinking about important relationships in our lives. 

It can be difficult to find time for yourself when you’re busy trying to keep up with responsibilities at home, with partners, kids, and work. You may even avoid looking inwards because you’re uncomfortable with what you might see.

Unfortunately, this kind of neglect can have a high price. Your relationship with yourself plays a major role in determining your happiness and success.

Turn things around with these suggestions for creating and maintaining a healthy self-image.

 Cultivating Self-Awareness:

1.  Question your assumptions. You might be overestimating how well you know yourself. That’s especially true if you have trouble understanding and regulating your emotions. Examine your beliefs to see if there is really any evidence to back them up.

2. Take time to reflect. In addition to relieving stress, quiet reflection can help you gain insights into your thinking and behavior. Set aside a few minutes to observe what’s on your mind. You can gradually increase the time if you find it helpful.

3. Start a journal. Use an app or notebook to track your daily activities. A written record will be more reliable than your memory, and reviewing it enables you to spot patterns you may want to change.

4. Ask for feedback. Others can sometimes see us more objectively. Find someone you trust and let them know that you’d appreciate their honest assessment.

5. Make art. Do you struggle to put your feelings into words? Expressing your creativity through drawing or crafts is another way to process your emotions. You can also learn about yourself based on your reactions to the works of great artists and novelists.

6. Set goals. Demanding experiences often show us our hidden strengths or areas where we need to become more resilient. Take on challenges that will help you to learn and grow.

Treating Yourself With Compassion: 

1. Let go of judgements. Love and accept yourself as you are. Catch yourself when you’re being critical, so you can replace negative thoughts with more positive and encouraging messages.

2. Praise yourself. Pay yourself at least one compliment each day. Look in the mirror while you admire your amazing parenting skills or your recent weight loss.

3. Eat healthy. Basic self-care is fundamental to your relationship with yourself. Start with a nutritious diet that gives you the energy you need to enjoy life. Instead of feeling deprived, treat yourself to your favorite foods in moderation.

4. Exercise regularly. Current guidelines recommend that adults get at least 150 minutes of moderate-intensity aerobic physical activity each week. Find a variety of activities that will keep you motivated.

5. Sleep well. Shortchanging yourself on sleep speeds up your heartbeat, raises your blood pressure, and impairs your memory. Stick to a consistent bedtime and aim for 7 to 8 hours of high-quality rest.

6. Give generously. Taking care of yourself increases your ability to have a positive impact on others, and that brings more joy into your life. Volunteer in your community and support worthy causes. Do favors for neighbors and coworkers.

7. Consider coaching. Changing your self-image can take a lot of work. Talking with a coach may help you deal with childhood experiences or other longstanding issues.

8. Take charge of your life by making yourself a top priority. Give yourself the same love and respect that you would show to a close friend. You’ll make your life more satisfying, and you’ll have more happiness to share with others.

If you need help with your relationship with yourself, whether it is growing that relationship, or reconnecting with yourself we are here to help at Interwined Intimacy Coaching